LET'S TALK ABOUT . . .


                                                       "SIGNS OF THE SEASON"     


There are signs of the season all around those of us in Western society.  It is the Christmas/Holiday season for millions.  Those signs lift our spirits and enhance our anticipation of that which is to come.  They also remind us of the hope associated with this season.  It is good to be reminded and reflect on how much there is to be thankful for and hopeful about.  In a world that is reeling with tragic incidents and uncertainty, this is especially indicated.  

For Christmas celebrators those signs include decorations, busy malls, greeting cards, shopping lists, visits to Santa, baking, family gatherings, special programs and so forth.  For others the signs and meaning of the season are different and often go unnoticed by the majority of the population.  It is good for us to be reminded of this and sensitively acknowledge and respect the traditions of others as they celebrate. 

It has always been interesting to me how many feel they betray their own beliefs and traditions if they respect another's.  This may be proportional to the dichotomous nature of one's beliefs.  It may be an expression of perceived loyalty.  It may be fear of the unknown or discomfort with difference.  It may simply be a quiet resignation to live out one's own dignity peacefully.

For many Christmas includes some acknowledgement or inclusion of a manger scene with Joseph, Mary and baby Jesus.  One of the most beloved Christmas carols is Silent Night.  It is often sung to candlelight.  In the Christmas story the Light of God is heralded to have been born into a dark world where God has been perceived of as silent.  Biblical history has held to the belief that God had been silent for over four hundred years, during the time between the Old and New Testaments. That would imply that on that Silent Night God was breaking His silence in the birth of Jesus.  Symbolic of that in the story is Zechariah's silence being broken at the time of John the Baptist's birth.  Interesting!

Have you ever noticed that at this time of year we often hear from those we do not hear from any other time of year?  It is part of the season.  It comes in multiple formats: greeting cards, e cards, phone calls, texts, visits and so forth.  There seems to be a need to greet others where we would otherwise neglect to do so.  Greetings are one of the signs of the season.  We almost feel compelled at this time of year to extend some kind of extra greeting to those we pass or meet.

Whatever our traditions or belief system I hope we will all make an extra effort to extend greetings to others.  We never know the impact that may have on another individual or their day.  It is important to be sensitive in doing so but to be paralyzed by a fear of offending is not good either.  It is a good time to connect or reconnect.  It is respectful to wish others and their families well.

Best wishes as you celebrate this Season.  I trust that you will enjoy the signs of the season.

Until next time . . . this is, Just Janice!
 

LET'S TALK ABOUT . . .


                                                   "IN THE SPIRIT OF THE SEASON"


What is it about this time of year that has such a profound effect on us: the anticipation of gifts, reconnecting with family and friends, celebrations, time off from daily routines, giving more than we normally would the rest of the year, or simply welcoming a new year?  Whatever it is, this season can bring out both the best and the worst in us.  Sometimes the worst comes about because of too much of the best. We anticipate, indulge and commiserate our exercise of excesses, in whatever direction, in the spirit of the season. 

What is it about us that cycles through this year after year?  Many vow they are not going to do it again next year and yet they know they will probably get caught up in the spirit of the season and repeat the cycle.  It is almost like some kind of anticipated, exercised and often regretted catharsis.  We need this time of year to somehow be special rather than disappointing.  We need to feel like we have participated rather than having been left out.

It is interesting how much of the world pauses to take note of the season: there are temporary truces, cease fires, government shutdowns, market closures and so forth.  It is interesting that it is somewhat of a global phenomenon even if only in reaction to those who do participate around the world at such high levels of societies.  Its occurrence is acknowledged in many sectors of the world where it takes on a culturally different significance.  Sometimes it is respected, sometimes it is rejected.  Whatever our response or reaction, it makes a statement about us individually and culturally. 

There is a part of us as human beings that I call existential self.  It has to do with the meaning and significance we attach to our existence.  Philosophers and theologians have debated it probably as long as we have possessed the language to do so.  Many do not believe they even think about such "deep" topics and yet they are living out whatever it is they believe life is about.  We all do.  Some are just more conscious or intentional about "fleshing out" their existential beliefs. 

There is a part of us that knows we were meant for some kind of connection.  We need to somehow feel like we have been a part of something bigger than we are to validate something deep within us. Many believe that need is met by our relationships with family, friends, neighbors, colleagues and so forth.  Others believe it needs to include some kind of connection to an existential being.  AA calls it "a higher power." Some believe it is an extra-terrestrial connection, aliens.  World religions describe and prescribe connection to the person or object of their faith or stated belief system.

What does all of this have to do with the Holiday season?  Is there any connection?  It is in many cultures and celebrations an intrinsically existential celebration.  How about you?  What meaning do you assign to your celebrations?  Perhaps that is not something you consciously think about.  You just want to celebrate.  Whether that be in the "spirit" of the season or in the "Spirit" of the season, I respectfully wish you a meaningful season!

Until next time . . . this is, Just Janice!



 



 

LET'S TALK ABOUT . . .


                                                 "SEASON'S GREETINGS"

There is a tendency at this time of year to offer greetings or holiday wishes to those we have little regular contact with throughout the rest of the year.  It is nice to hear all of the good wishes being exchanged!  It is too bad that does not extend to the rest of the year.  It is like when there are tragic events that come into our lives and we lay aside whatever other feelings we may have to pay our respects to the grieving family or pitch in and help in a natural disaster.  It is as if we need a higher, a special, or a tragic event to move us outside of our normal response patterns. 

There is something in that common to our humanity.  I have often wondered if it is the tendency to need an external stimulus or source of motivation to do what we would not otherwise freely choose to do.  We see this all the time in parenting.  Our children often need us to provide that external stimulus or motivation to do the responsible thing.  How many adults would obey the traffic laws if it were not for a law enforcement deterrent?  How about doing what our bosses ask on their terms?

I have often wondered why it is so hard to internalize what we are offered externally, especially when we know it would be in our best interest to do so.  Sometimes I think it is just our natural reticence or resistance against being governed from an outside source.  Sometimes I think we do not agree with what is being asked of us.  Sometimes it is a lack of trust that others have our best interest at heart.
Sometimes I think we already have life experiences and the corresponding emotional deterrents in our conditioning that resist such choices being made freely.

Whatever it is we all know that those tendencies lie within us.  We like to self-govern.  Too little and we risk being irresponsible, too much and we risk being entitled.  Somewhere in between there is a healthy middle ground of self-regulation.  Venturing out into the realm of the extremes can be healthy or unhealthy.  Sometimes amazingly innovative discoveries are the result of trying something risky and a bit extreme.  Sometimes those same choices and behaviors result in disaster.

Self-regulation is worthy topic of discussion, one that deserves much more than what is being said here.  The holiday season provides all of us with an opportunity to practice it on multiple levels: spending, sleeping, eating, partying and so forth.  We joke about it every year as we push those boundaries to the extreme.  It is almost an inherited right or tradition in our culture!  Perhaps it is a form of catharsis, an excuse to release whatever has been pent up inside of us.

I don't know what makes for a "good" holiday season for you and your family.  Some would scoff that there is no possibility for such in their life.  Perhaps we can somehow be a part of reversing that for someone in our corner of the world this year: by volunteering, by giving, by simply greeting someone you would not otherwise greet.  I hope the holiday season recharges you, refreshes you and gives you pause to reflect as we end one year and enter another.

Until next time . . . this is, Just Janice!